I pointed. Of course it was the wrong one. Even though we've owned our KIA for two years.
"But, Paul, a bunch in a row were silver."
We both laughed.
When we left the next store he said "Well, for a change you turned right when you came out of the store instead of left. You still went in the wrong direction if you were headed for the parking lot."
Again we laughed. I am famously geographically challenged and normally turn left to go, well, anywhere.
When we left Radio Shack, I said "I never knew that t.v. antennas were now those flat-screen thingies."
We both know that I believe that all that's really necessary to know about tvs is to first push the big red button and then push the small red button on the remote to turn the t.v. on and off. And to know that when the remote doesn't work, it means I have to change the batteries. Though he changes the batteries.
To top it all off, Paul was the one that found the two sweaters for me that we bought in Marshall's. Just like that. After I'd been looking at sweater after sweater on rack after rack.
It's really amazing that we've let each other live for forty-eight years of marriage. I mean, my poor husband puts up with a wife who loses the car, loses the parking lot, and refuses to be interested in learning anything of mechanical or electronic complexity.
And I put up with a husband who can sometimes find clothes for me better than I can - and I'm THE WOMAN!! THE SHAME OF IT!! A man who learned the exact opposite way from mine of how to set the table and thinks his way is right because he learned it in the Seminary. A man who never uses the phone if he can talk me into doing it.
Long ago we figured out that we were both broken, imperfect people, unlikely to change. So we learned to laugh. Laughs are always good fixes. We learned to compromise. For example, I always ask HIM to find the car in the parking lot so I'm not arrested for breaking into and entering some stranger's vehicle. And he defers to ME so I buy a different brand of ice cream suckers or mustard or cookies occasionally so we don't keep eating the same tried-and-true flavors over and over and over again.
We have grown and matured over the years. We've learned to choose our battles. If one of us is overtired or grumpy, the other one backs away, knowing it's downright suicidal to disagree with anything because you might get your head bitten off and it takes too long to grow a new one.
When we do fight, battles definitely, mercifully, take a shorter amount of time to complete. We don't really have the energy anymore for protracted warfare. And night battles don't occur because neither of us can walk or drive around the neighborhood at night to cool off. Arthritis kills the first option and night blindness kills the second, so only day fighting is left. Now we're down to twelve allowable hours to fight instead of twenty-four. I'm telling you, age brings improvement to marriage all around.
So have we really fixed our marriage? Well, WE are broken, not the marriage. And we know it. We accept each other As Is. We laugh, compromise, pray, hold hands, kiss, and say "I love you" frequently. And we haven't given each other away yet. So I guess we're good for another forty-eight!
"I BELONG TO MY LOVER AND FOR ME HE YEARNS.." (Song of Songs 7:11)