Tomorrow, Sunday, June 6, my husband Paul and I leave to go on retreat. Since this is a spiritual time to "Be Away" with the Lord, I will not be doing new posts during this time. We will be returning on Thursday, June 10, in time for our daughter Mary's surgery on July 11. Hopefully I will begin blogging again on July 12. I'll be praying for all of you while I'm on retreat, and please pray for my daughter on July 11!
Dear Friends,
Tomorrow, Sunday, June 6, my husband Paul and I leave to go on retreat. Since this is a spiritual time to "Be Away" with the Lord, I will not be doing new posts during this time. We will be returning on Thursday, June 10, in time for our daughter Mary's surgery on July 11. Hopefully I will begin blogging again on July 12. I'll be praying for all of you while I'm on retreat, and please pray for my daughter on July 11!
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My baby grand-daughter, Octavia, is currently a Daddy's girl. Her Mama tells me with a chuckle that when she gets too near, her daughter puts her tiny hand in her Mama's face and SHOVES her away. Hilarious! My oldest grand-daughter, Ellen, is moving into her first apartment soon, and it's just the right size. But today when a number of family members crowded inside it to ooh and aah, Ellen, used to her family home's space, complained "I'm feeling claustrophobic." Again, - Hilarious!
People are so funny. Especially when you're close, and you love them, and you can enjoy the quirks, the teasing, the in-jokes. Cats and dogs are funny, too. Each one has a unique personality to make us fall in love. Bird poo, falling SPLAT suddenly on a car windshield makes me laugh and go "EEEEW" at the same time. ( My husband does NOT laugh at this, however.) Every moment of life is rife with wonder, love, laughter. If only we would take the time to inwardly pause and look! If only we would relax more often and feel thanksgiving for life well up in our hearts! Most amazing - and miraculous - to me - is that we can still laugh, still love, still enjoy tranquil and awe-inspiring life moments, even after we have endured and are enduring great tragedies and illnesses. The resilience of the human spirit isn't even known to us until we HAVE suffered. Then we see the resilience of our spirit shine in the darkness and know that it cannot be extinguished. We can weep out of loss one moment, and melt into a loved one's tender embrace the next. St. Paul, who suffered so much in his life, understood this human resilience and capacity for love and laughter and centered it in our trust in God. "Rejoice in the Lord always. I shall say it again: rejoice!...The Lord is near. Have no anxiety at all, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, make your requests known to God. Then the peace of God that surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus." I love that expression "Take time to smell the roses." I LOVE digging my nose inside my rose petals and just inhaling their perfume. I love sitting in a cottage and gazing out at the majestic tides of the ocean. I love watching clouds floating lazily over my head. I love eating Amy's potent chili, drinking white wine with Merritt, tasting Paul Jr.'s home-made beer, discussing novels and poetry with Mike, hearing about Greek customs from Stephanie, ducking to avoid Mary Beth's amiable verbal zingers, drinking scads of Keurig coffee with Brian, hearing John's enthusiastic stories about the latest in Broadway Theater, and cuddling Cathy after she comes in the back door. This is life. Rejoice in it - and be thankful to the Lord Who, even in the midst of our most sorrowful times, still gives life and love to us in such beautiful, overwhelming abundance. There's a time in every adult's life when he or she realizes that it's time to make a will. Time to decide who or what (charity, for example), we would like to receive our legacy of money or property. But, there's also a time in every adult's life to think about this: what spiritual legacy will we leave when we die? And who will receive it? Whom have we affected profoundly - for good or for ill - in our lives? Who are our physical and spiritual children? What will they remember about what our lives have taught them? People, concrete relationships, are really what matter most in our lives. And it's very interesting to reflect on St. Paul's relationship with young Timothy, whom he loved like a son. Paul was Timothy's mentor and role model. He took Timothy on missionary journeys and sent him on special missions. Eventually Timothy became administrator of the community at Ephesus. Paul wrote Timothy three letters when he (Paul) was near the end of his own career, after he had suffered imprisonments, beatings, and persecutions. These letters are Paul's spiritual legacy to his spiritual son. He writes in his second letter "to Timothy, my dear child..." about his faith and the Christian lifestyle which he prays Timothy will continue to live: "God did not give us a spirit of cowardice but rather of power and love and self-control..." (1:7) "Do not be ashamed of your testimony to our Lord, nor of me, a prisoner for His sake; but bear your hardship for the Gospel with the strength that comes from God." (1:8). "Turn from youthful desires and pursue righteousness, faith, love, and peace...Avoid foolish and ignorant debates, for you know that they breed quarrels." (2:22). "You have followed my teaching, way of life, purpose, faith, patience, love, endurance, persecutions, and sufferings...In fact, all who want to live religiously in Christ Jesus will be persecuted.. But you, remain faithful to what you have learned and believed, because you know from whom you learned it." (3: 10 ff.) "The time of my departure is at hand...I have competed well; I have finished the race; I have kept the faith. From now on, the crown of righteousness awaits me, which the Lord, the just judge, will award to me on that day." (4: 6-8). Being a good person means living a counter-cultural lifestyle, a life of fidelity to relationships and communities, love and compassion, purity and self-control, patience, and peace. It means not being afraid to speak what we believe without indulging in foolish quarrels or insults. It means realizing that there is a time in every life for joy and for tears, for celebrating and for mourning, for being welcomed and for being rejected, for being well and for dying well. If like Paul, we have lived a good, God- and people-centered life, one of courage, truth, and self-discipline, then we have run a good race. We have fought the good fight. We have left a spiritual legacy to be proud of. And God will make us forever welcome in His Kingdom. I look at myself in the mirror. I frown. I say to myself: "Boy, you've gotten FAT. You're still NOT DISCIPLINED enough to use the exercise bike. And your CHIN! It's SAGGING!" I look at myself in my inner mirror. I frown and mutter "You still have that wicked TEMPER, don't you? You get GRUMPY, and your innocent husband gets to hear your NASTY voice. And you can be so CRITICAL. Who fitted YOU for a halo? And - by the way - you're still too LAZY to pray enough. If you don't keep going to God, you can't keep on keepin' on, Girl Friend." Nope. On bad days, I don't like my outer or my inner me. On bad days, I don't see any growth from my adolescent self to my so-called mature self. I have no hope. I'm ALMOST ready to throw in the towel. But, if I stop to remember that I'm God's child, if I remind myself - in spite of my bleak mood - that I AM struggling every day, trying to grow more patient, more loving, more self-disciplined in my physical and spiritual habits - then I can hear God's Voice reminding me "To everyone who conquers, I will give some of the hidden manna,and I will give a white stone, and on that stone is written a new name that no one knows except the one who receives it." (Apocalypse2:17.) The Lord knows us more fully and intimately than we know ourselves, not just as a people but as individuals. The Lord knows our unique hidden struggles - with life, with others, with ourselves. The Lord feeds us daily with hidden manna - Jesus, our Living Bread from Heaven - if we recognize and acknowledge our hunger for holiness. And the Lord considers each of us His Beloved, to whom He gives a special new name, because we are reborn in Christ. This name is a Love Name, a name that signifies how unique, how precious, we are to Him. A name that encompasses our personal struggles and triumphs, our good works, our personal charisms. Only in Heaven will He breathe our hidden name to us - and whisper "You are irreplaceable in My Heart." The more we remember the One Who loves us, the more we have the strength, the courage, the joy, to love ourselves. Because every moment of every day He is whispering our True Names to our souls as He quietly, patiently loves us into New Life in Him. "I respectfully disagree," a friend recently wrote me in a comment on Facebook. I was so moved! She had the courage to disagree with me and share her own life experience. She was kind enough to do so with courtesy. There are so many really complex issues that face us constantly in our personal lives and in our country's life. And everyone has a different opinion about what we should do or what our country should do Not all opinions are given as kindly as my friend's. I have read and heard pure hatred and disrespect from so many - on t.v. and in strangers' comments. You know the current Hot Button issues: Hobby Lobby. Immigration. Abortion. What I have discovered is that most people seem to speak from their personal experiences, what I call their particular "piece of the truth." For example, these are stories I've read re. the immigration issue: "My family came here legally. We did it the right way. Why should they be treated any differently?" "Our borders are too porous - all these illegals are over-running the country and we in Border Patrol can't keep up!" "I've processed these cases. They're fleeing corrupt governments where drug gangs rule - and we're geographically close. Can you blame these kids' parents for sending them here?" "There are plenty of people waiting to enter legally who will be killed by their governments if they stay!" "Hey, those were kids on those buses. Have a little compassion!" Is anybody here wrong? I don't think so. Where's the truth, then? Here's where humility - and repentance - come in. The humility is to recognize that in regards to any moral issue, no one owns the whole truth. We know the Ten Commandments, God's instructions written in our hearts - the simple do's and don'ts. Don't murder, for example. But - there's always the case for self-defense, for an individual and for a country. There are Quakers and Ecumenical Pax Christi members today who refuse all violence, who would never in conscience go to war. God has written other instructions on our hearts - Love your neighbor, as given to us in the Beatitudes and the Works of Mercy - Feed the hungry. Care for the sick. Visit the prisoner. Bury the Dead. Teach the ignorant. Usually these are the commands God speaks to our hearts - Now. In the moment. Jesus tells us, "Don't judge." Pope Francis, who calls himself a sinner, says "Who am I to judge?" Sin is hardness of heart. Sin is refusing to see or say that someone else also knows part of the Truth - God's truth - that has to be weighed in a situation. All of us have a knee jerk reaction to judge the other guy. Repentance is pulling back and listening to another heart. Only God knows the full truth of any situation. And God needs each of us to respectfully share what we have experienced and what we know. To LIVE what we know. A moral theologian once said "God sends people who are soldiers to defend us. God sends conscientious objectors to remind us of the unspeakable horror and brutality of war." Truth is never Either/Or. It's Both/And. We need to pray hard for our national leaders to guide as well. And, if faced with people in need - compassion never hurts. In fact, it heals. Lord, my head is bowed and I am crying. For myself. For my family. For my friends. For my country. For my world.
I mourn the loss of family members and friends. I miss them so much! Help me to trust that You are our Creator, Who made each of us to dwell with You. Help me to know they are safe, well, and happy in Your embrace. I grieve the loss of health for so many. Help me to trust that You are a healing God and that You already desire and choose to heal each person in the way that he or she needs healing. I grieve the loss of relationships for so many. Help me to trust that You are the great Unifier Who can mend broken relationships and hearts. I grieve the pain of those wounded by hate and discrimination. Help me to trust that You are Father to all and hear every prayer from every religious denomination and consider everyone to be made in Your Image and Likeness. I grieve for my country, torn apart by so many problems and issues. All of us cry out in anger and frustration, knowing part of the truth, gleaned from our own experiences. All of us cry out for both justice and mercy. Because we are great, because we are the Land of Opportunity, people want to come to us from everywhere, fleeing oppression. Because we are Free, fanatics from around the world want to destroy us and re-make us in their image. Because we are a land of Enterprise, even some of our own people, ruled by greed, take advantage of their brothers and sisters and destroy the lands and waters, refuse us jobs. Yet we are so divided within, in our politics, it would be easy to destroy ourselves! Oh God of Wisdom, You see and comprehend everything. You understand all, far beyond what we know with our limited vision. Heal our self-inflicted wounds. Give us courage and compassion to look beyond our own vision to a wider view of all our problems so we choose wisely and well in all our decisions. Choose wisely for our own country. Choose wisely for our world. Fill us with compassion, so we listen well to our brothers and sisters from around this world, hear the truth of their words, and respond with what they need. Cover us with Your Love, Lord, Your Mercy, Your Wisdom, so that for all of us, this country, this world, is our Home - where we can safely belong, - until You wipe every tear from our eyes and bring us to our heavenly Home. Amen. Our son John and his wife Stephanie are in from NYC for the week. Yesterday they brought over our grand-daughter Octavia, whom we hadn't seen since February! What a difference! The little girl who was just learning to sit is crawling all over, pulling herself up on furniture, waving at everybody -just a bundle of energy and personality. I said to myself - "Octavia, you can be ANYTHING!" We are confident that babies
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