On the surface, you may buy into the "God Loves You" line. But - how do you really perceive yourself? Do you really, in your heart of hearts, believe that God loves you? Or, do you really believe that, day by day, God is giving you a Performance Review, and you're constantly failing? What's happening is that your false identity is at war with your true identity given to you by God. God calls us His beloved sons and daughters! Bob Schuchts asks,
"How do you perceive yourself? Do you see yourself as the sum of all your weaknesses and failures, or the image of the beloved son or daughter? Do you believe you are cherished and deeply lovable or inherently worthless and easily discarded? Is your fundamental identity that of a sinner or a saint? Don't be too quick to answer these questions. You may believe one thing based on the way you have been taught, but quite another in the way you really see yourself in the depths of your heart. And this is no small matter. What you believe about yourself in your heart becomes your identity, which in turn shapes everything in your life." (from "Be Healed: A Guide To Encountering the Powerful Love of Jesus In Your Life.")
You may be outwardly successful, self-actuating, in a good relationship, - and STILL, deep inside, not really believe that God loves you. There may be a deep hole in your heart from all the relationships in your life in which you weren't or aren't really loved in a mature way. Perhaps your father or mother or both either abused you or neglected you or were hyper-critical, or ultra-demanding, or failed you at some level. Perhaps your school system or job has raised you to be so perfectionistic, so performance-oriented, that you don't even know how to just "BE!"
How can any of us with full confidence call God "Father" or "Mother" when our identities have been so warped or so violated, either by our families or our culture or personal experiences? I really believe that each of us has unhealed "identity wounds"! This is why Jesus says that he is the Divine Physician; over and over we have to come to Jesus in prayer and ask for "identity healing."
But just think about this - when you are baptized, you LITERALLY RECEIVE A NEW IDENTITY - YOU BECOME A BELOVED SON OR DAUGHTER OF GOD THROUGH AND IN CHRIST!!! No matter who biologically brought you into the world, no matter how your parents may have failed you, no matter how you've sinned and failed in your own relationships, you have a new identity now. If you know any parents who have adopted children, they'll tell you that they love their children as if they were biologically their own flesh and blood. Even if they also have biological children, they love their children equally. Think how much more God loves us as God's adopted sons and daughters!
When Jesus entered into the Jordan River to be baptized, Heaven was opened up, the Holy Spirit descended upon him in the form of a dove, and the Father's voice rang out, "You are my beloved son; with you I am well-pleased." (Luke 3: 21-22) Notice that this scene in Jesus' life happens before he has even begun his ministry, before he has accomplished anything. The Father is expressing great delight in him, not for his performance, but for who he is! And that is how God loves us - freely, unconditionally, for who we are, with the same depth of love that He has for Jesus.
Imagine yourself being baptized in the Jordan, and God saying these words to you: "You are my beloved son/daughter; with you I am well-pleased." Can you hear God speak those words to you? Do you accept them in your heart? Bob Schuchts observes,
"I don't have any trouble believing the Father delights in Jesus. Why wouldn't he? Jesus is perfect. He does everything the Father wants him to do. He is God. But when it comes to seeing myself as a beloved son or daughter of the Father, I am not nearly as confident. I am flawed; I don't do everything the Father commands me to do. I am far from perfect, despite pretending to be sometimes. Can you relate? Do you see how quickly we go back to our performance and shame, rather than trusting the covenant relationship we have with the Father through our Baptisms?
"There is so much in us that doubts whether the Father really loves and delights in us. No matter how many times we read passages of Scripture that assure us that the Father loves us with every bit of love that he has for Jesus (e.g., Jn 15 - 17), we still find it difficult to let it sink in." We still find it easier to think of God as the Divine Taskmaster instead of as our adoptive Parent Who finds great joy in us!.
On the Feast of the Sacred Heart of Jesus, Pope Francis said, "The Lord loves us tenderly....He does not love us with words. He comes close....and gives us His love with tenderness....This is really very difficult: letting ourselves be loved by Him."
During our lives, two identities are continually at war within us: a false identity obsessed with "performance" and "perfection" and even self-loathing versus our true identity as beloved sons and daughters of God. If, over and over again, we choose to "live out of" our true identity, God heals our broken, warped identities at continually deeper and deeper levels. Every time we approach God in our hearts and say, "Here I am, naked before You. I know You see everything about me - everything I've said and done - but I also know - I TRUST! that You love me because You've told me that You do - so, please heal me in all the ways that I need healing in my life - " then we're freeing God to act FOR US, and IN US. We can call God "Father" or "Mother," "Friend," or "Beloved," and discover how intimately God loves us, and how God's love frees us from a false, shame-filled performance identity to love ourselves and others.
Don't forget that when you were baptized, the Holy Spirit descended upon you, the Spirit of wisdom, knowledge, counsel, faith, hope, love, peace, joy, - and healing. This Spirit of Creative Love whispers to you daily, "Remember the shortness of your life. Remember you are united with Christ and beloved of the Father. Let me take away any remaining fear and shame that ensnares and enslaves you. Let me anoint you and re-create your true identity in Christ as an adopted son or daughter of God so this uniquely-you true identity becomes fresh and new and powerful again! Listen to Me: I PASSIONATELY LOVE YOU! All I desire and yearn for is for you to PASSIONATELY LOVE ME in return!"
TAKE COURAGE - HOLD OUT YOUR HEART AS A GIFT TO GOD - AND RECEIVE A TREASURE OF LOVE FAR GREATER THAN YOU CAN EVEN IMAGINE.