So many divorced men and women are raising their children alone, or sharing their children with a spouse. So many single mothers are raising children with the aid of grandparents, brothers, and sisters. Other men and women are single parents because a spouse has died.
Many of these parents are still reeling from grief because of a broken relationship, or the death of their loved one. They are dealing with depression and/or feelings of abandonment and still are heroically summoning the love and energy to be there for their children. How often these children are a source of comfort for them! God is present for these heroic parents every minute of every day because God is always nearest to the broken-hearted. God is faithful even if a human being has been unfaithful. God still loves us, in fact especially loves us, when a human being no longer loves us or is no longer with us.
People who are struggling, because of their own mistakes or because of the cruelties of others, must never despair. "Although the life of a person is in a land full of thorns and weeds, there is always a space in which the good seed can grow. You have to trust God," says Pope Francis.
Single parent families are not inferior to two-parent families; they are simply different. Single parent families are inundated with grace and mercy, the ever-flowing life of God. And where God is, a home is. Where God is, God is continually gifting us, so that all difficulties may be overcome. When a loving step-parent enters the family and there are two parents once more, a child who has two mothers now or two dads receives hopefully double the love. Three of my grand-children have a Step-Dad; their Mom helps the oldest boy think about the life-lessons he has received from his deceased father, and the life-lessons he receives from his Step-Dad.
In regard to non-traditional families like these, it is so important that grand-parents and other family members are supportive, that they don't push the children to take sides in family arguments, that they don't criticize or judge people whose marriages or relationships have broken up. God doesn't negatively judge us; God simply chooses to be with us to help us put the pieces of our lives back together again and to learn from each relationship so that we are better prepared for the ones to come. And - if there are children, they were meant to "be" in this world. Which means that that relationship which has dissolved was also meant to "be" for the time that it existed. God writes straight with crooked lines.
Every family home where love dwells is a domestic church because God lives there. God's presence makes every loving action holy, a daily sacrament giving His grace. "Love is shown by little things, by attention to small daily signs which make us feel at home. Faith grows when it is lived and shaped by love. That is why our families, our homes, are true domestic churches," says Pope Francis.
Whatever the circumstances are of a non-traditional family - and there are types which I have not mentioned - the main component is the sharing of the love of God among all the members of such families. Every family can be a faithful witness to the power of God which is present in the midst of them. Every family carries brokenness, even if it is hidden: illnesses, deaths, rivalries, estrangements, emotional difficulties. Sometimes we have to acknowledge our own personal brokenness or our families' brokenness to ourselves before we can begin to honestly pray for God's wisdom and strength and counsel. Yet, even and especially when we acknowledge our family's brokenness to ourselves, that truth must not make us feel inferior or a failure.
Pope Francis gives every family wonderful encouragement when he observes:
"Perfect families do not exist. This must not discourage us. Quite the opposite. Love is something we learn; love is something we live; love grows as it is forged by the concrete situations which each particular family experiences. Love is born and constantly develops amid lights and shadows."
So remember: even when you and your family are most stressed, that is God's opportunity to make sure that we are most blessed.